Resolutions.. and all that jazz

To RESOLVE to do something is a really big deal... But people flippantly make New Year's Resolutions each and every year... and dismiss them before February...
they Resolve to get fit...
loose weight
look this way
or that way,
do this
or that...
read such and such a book
or stop smoking...
It's a real PICK a rabbit out of a hat sort of thing isn't it...

I generally NEVER make a New Years Resolution...
I don't like the pressure...
I feel like if I ought to be resolving to do something,
to change something,
or to sieze something in my life...
then I just OUGHT to do it... and not add the pressure
of "new year's" to it...
cuz I'll be sure to fail...

Pressure often causes me to fail...
When I was a little kid...
I was THE fastest kid in the neighborhood
each and every time we raced....
till someone got a stopwatch....
When I was a teen
I joined swimteam, and was GREAT
at practice
but at the meet when they shot that gun ...
it just slowed me down, like someone strapped weights to my legs...
I never froze...
i didn't have like a panic attack,
it just stressed me out I think...
and the stress was like
DEAD WEIGHT....
slowing me down.....

New Years is like that...
I decided a long time ago that a Resolution
is serious...
You resolve to succeed from a union
you resolve to do MAJOR things... or not to...

This year I have made an exception...
It may be my last...
I hope my blog here will keep me accountable...

I resolve to love more deeply those I dwell with first
and all people second...
I resolve to walk more steadfastly in grace and peace and mercy...
Allowing grace of myself as I do others...
I resolve to be slow to anger and abounding in loving kindness..
To SEEK First the KINGDOM
to ASK the Lord for all my needs
to KNOCK for as long as it takes...
To Draw Near to God for HE WILL DRAW NEAR TO ME...
I resolve to LOVE God with all that I am more than I have...
to love my neighbors as myself...
starting with those in my house...
love being patient, even when they are not..
kind even if they are not.
and so on and so forth...
to BE an INSTRUMENT in my Redeemers hand...
To be the Wise woman building her house
and not the fool tearing it down...

I resolve... to walk closer to God on this path
one foot in front of another... and enjoy HIM
and breath in the moments
absorbing the sights as richly as I can before my eyes blink again...
I resolve to hug more
Kiss more deeply
hold hands more often
tickle and laugh heartily
eat of the bounty that God offers to me
JOYFULLY, thankfully, with gratitude...

I resolve...
do you?