Quiet and gentle spirit....

I confess, this is an area, that I need work on. I have opinions, and I am not always quiet about them. I have passions, and I am not always gentle in them. God has convicted me to be prayerful, and intentional in this area of my life... It is an area where flesh seems to dictate sometimes....
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With regard to this conviction, I prayerfully attempted (quite successfully praise and glory unto the Lord for His work in that) to be "quiet" this weekend with my husband and children. Not rudely quiet, not shunning quiet, but quiet none the less. I strove with all my prayers to be earnestly quiet, gentle, gracious... I listened, to what they said, and to how they said it. I attempted to be learners of my family. Learn I did.
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I learned things I knew, but have not for whatever reasons, not walked in the knowledge of. Does this make sense to you. It's rather like knowing that knowing to tell a lie is a sin, verses, telling the truth, because Jesus is truth, and you have been adopted, redeemed, and must represent the glorious one who saved and redeemed you. Because you strive to be more like Christ. There are things we know, but we don't live life based on that knowledge, we often walk about as if we didn't know it.
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I learned that my eldest son is sincere, and thoughtful, and eager to become a godly man. I learned that he has questions and thoughts, and given some quiet, he will be quicker to inquire. Hush mama... hush. His smile will win you to his side, and hold your confidence.
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I learned my daughter is very sociable, yet very shy. She has much to say, and many topics and interests to choose from, but she is timid to begin a dialogue, and smiles of encouragement go miles with her. And her smile will warm your heart.
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I learned, that my youngest boy, is PERSONALITY in caps. He can charm the pants off anyone, and by the end of an evening, even strangers want to know him, and address me as his mom, rather than by my name. His smile lights up the room, and have everyone leave happy, and glad to have met him, even at a wake.
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I learned my husband has a lot more on his mind than I ever knew, and sometimes he will think for several minutes before finishing his sentence... I learned that I interrupt him more than I ever knew.. I learned that he is wise, and welcoming, and his humor can lighten a heavy heart in a god honoring way.
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I learned some people I love are frustrated, some are insecure, some are hiding behind degrees, I learned a lot of people have hearts that hurt, but they don't want for you to know it.
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I learned that my words can be like money. If I throw too many of them into the conversation, too quick, they act like inflation. And the words, become worth less. That they'd have more value, if I valued them more. That sometimes LESS is more.
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I learned that when I have a whole lot to say, God is always ready to hear me, and it isn't the end of the world when I ramble, because His Holy Spirit, corrects my sinful thoughts, guides my heart in straighter paths, and comforts me when I am lonely... that when I have much on my mind, much to say, I must go to God in prayer and speak it all to him, first. He shall help me sort. He shall listen, and prepare me to listen and speak in a worthy way.
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And gee that s what I learned in just one weekend. I am a bit nervous to continue in this great experiment. I shared it with a friend at church on Sunday. It felt so good to talk, and boy did I talk. I got into the car, and my face reddened... I was so eager to tell her how I ramble, that I rambled.... she was gracious, and we both were amused later, (gosh I think that was a mutual amusement). But it is funny, how much there can be learned from just a little obedience to the call of God in our lives.
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Glory be to God... May He continue to encourage me, strengthen me, and refine me. That I might grow in grace and virtue, and become a quiet and gentle spirit. Even if I am a Jesus Freak inside. ! ha ha!
Be blessed friends